Remembering Something We’ve Already Heard

Thankfulness.  Gratefulness.  I think most of us think about it at least more this time of year, November, than any other time of year.  But, I wonder what would happen if we thought about it this much all year long.  Now, I know people have said that many times before me, for sure.  I also know many people have started “thankfulness jars” or named it many other things.  How many things would we would have in there this year had we started it last year?  I would hope that it would be full with 365 pieces of paper in there where we have been thankful for something every day of the year.  Maybe we would be thankful for the same thing some days.  I think it would be interesting to check that jar or box in a year and see not only how many papers are in there but read them and see what is in there.  We don’t have to have a big family, we don’t have to have kids, we just have to have ourselves, individually.  We can have the jar beside our bed to remind us each night to think about what we’re thankful for.  You know, sometimes I’m not just thankful for something tangible but sometimes I’m thankful for the intangible.  Things like the ability to forgive someone who hurt me, a big laugh, a big cry to let something out, the ability to smile even when things go wrong.  I guess as long as we can move and/or think, we really do have so much to be thankful for.

If we forget about it because we get busy, which we can be thankful for, we can start this jar or even re-start it any time of the year.  Maybe putting a date on each piece of paper we put in the jar would be fun so we can look back and remember that time of year when we were thankful for that particular thing.

I know that after being hurt so bad as I have been I have to really force myself to be thankful for anything.  I just want my life back.  But, maybe God has something much better than that life.  Maybe someone who will treat me more tenderly.  Maybe a ministry of some kind.  Or, maybe just to be – for if others can see how I am looking to God for my happiness instead of anything or anyone else they will see that God is enough.  I told God that back in 1999.  I remember it exactly.  I told God while in the shower as I was crying about my situation, I finally broke and said, “You are enough, God, you are enough.”  Then I think I said something like no matter where I am You are enough.  I can look back and see how I got complacent and forgot that promise.  I can look back and see so many mistakes.  I can look back and look back and look back.  But when you are looking back you can’t go forward – with anything.

I do have to say here that every since I was a little girl I have liked romance movies of all kinds and I thought that in real life you can have “movie” romance.  I see now that it is just in the movies and is wonderful to watch but if there is anyone out there that is like me, be careful.  You can make a lot of mistakes by believing real life is anything like the movies.  I really don’t want to burst anyone’s bubble here.  There may be rare occasions when life can be or is a fairytale.  For you, congratulations and don’t ever take it for granted or let it get old.

I just had to put that paragraph in there.  Maybe it wasn’t exactly at the right spot but it was something I felt I needed to say – if for nothing else but for myself.   But, now that I hopefully have that all straightened out in my head and am trying very hard to listen to God, my life is going to turn around, start going forward straight to God, and count for something!

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